Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Diddy and Foxx are Drinking Buddies

P Diddy has kept a low profile after that whole (Averted Gaze) dubious Vote or Die fiasco (we would too -- 17 percent of the vote consisted of 18-29 year olds, the same percentage as 2000). But that doesn't mean that he cannot drink with his "Extreme Drinking(TM)" mellow ("Youuurrr my beesshhht friend"), Jamie Foxx, according to something with delusions of grandeur called World Entertainment News Network:

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"Rap mogul Sean 'P Diddy' Combs shocked bar tenders at an exclusive Los Angeles bar last week by spending $8,000 on drinks for himself and actor pal Jamie Foxx.The hip-hop star gave the manager of popular nightspot, Guy's, $10,000 in cash and said, 'Just give me the change when we leave,' website Skynews.com reports.

"Diddy and the Collateral star drank champagnes and cocktails until the bar closed, and were left with just $2,000 change."

As someone who knows a bit about Herculean bouts of drinking in the evenings, here's our take on the most likely scenario of their proceedings:

P Diddy: If we give you a $9,980 tip, will you make us look good to the press?
Bartender: Sure, for a $9,980 tip I'd "love you long time"
Jamie Foxx: (Averted Gaze) ... Uh, that's all right, the press report will be enough.
Bartender: You're the boss.
P Diddy: But make us two Gin and Tonics for the road
Jamie Foxx: Yeah (showing off to Diddy), make em strong.
Bartender: (places drinks on counter) There you go ...
Jamie and Diddy both sip, then simultaneously spit out drink
Foxx: (dazed and confused) What is this?!
Diddy: (Tipsy) Y-Yeah ...
Foxx: You trying to kill us or something?
Diddy: I put this in my Bentley!
Bartender: (Initially offput, Then Gets the cue) Aww, sorry gentlemen, what was I thinking, that pure grain alcohol. Sorry.
Foxx: (Making sure entire bar overhears) Yeah, well, don't let it ever happen again.
Diddy: Yeah, lets get out of here. (Tries to get up from bar, but promptly falls to ton face)
Foxx: Puffy ... I can't see ... It's like "Ray," but this time ... I aint acting ... (passes out)


4 comments:

Rachel said...

It was just the two of them drinking? $8,000 of alcohol? And were they immediately taken to the hospital for a alcohol poisoning?

The Corsair said...

You know -- either the bartenders started adding dubious zeros to the drink prices after Jamie and Diddy went blind, or they both have wooden legs.

Rachel said...

Even if they were drinking $1,000 a bottle champagne, that's still 8 bottles of champagne. Even between two grown men, that's still a whole lotta alcohol. I once drank a bottle and a half of champagne and it was not pretty, really it wasn't.

Bernard said...

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